Why is he attached to me

Whatever way you decide to improve yourself in preparation for a happier life and a healthier partnership, the change begins with YOU. Focus not on trying to figure out how to help him attach, but rather on how your attachment style influences your relationship needs, behavior, reactions, and partner selection.

In increasing your awareness of these patterns, you are able to make more conscious partner selections that are more aligned with what you want, and not necessarily what you learned as a child. I believe that when you improve your capacity to love yourself fully, you attract a partner who can meet you there.

Ingrid V. Rodriguez, PhD — www. Since the beginning of documented human history there have been attempts at gaining love or admiration from others through the use of charms, spells, handbooks, attire, you name it. The truth is, we cannot make someone have feelings for us and if you think about it, why would you want to?

Imagine for a moment that you had the power to make whomever you desired emotionally attached to you immediately- would you not question the sincerity of their devotion to you? If they are not then you have options. You can wait and see if something develops in time or you can suffer your losses and search for someone who feels emotionally available to you. People attach to others for a number of reasons and the same reasons tend not to be gender specific and may have more to do with attachment style.

Again, there is nothing we can do to make someone feel the way they feel. How much time would you have saved yourself in the past if this were possible?!

Our feelings are our own and so are theirs. If you are unsure of your attachment patterns which form in early childhood then it is in your interest to conduct some personal research in this area. Once you know if you have some problems with attachment then you can fix them. What is seen cannot be unseen. If you are rushing someone to attach to you or you find yourself easily and indiscriminately falling for whomever you are dating that you may have some attachment problems.

The right person is not going to leave you within the first weeks of dating if they have not professed their undying devotion to you or even attached to you emotionally. A great boyfriend also has all these characteristics because of his deep emotional attraction to you. Check out our article on 25 remarkable things a good boyfriend does. Having a man emotionally attached to you is a great place to be. When a man is emotionally invested in the relationship in the same way that you are, only then can the relationship stand the test of time.

But it takes a bit of work just like every relationship. If you do any of these 13 things, you will have him hooked to you. This point only applies if you are not yet in a relationship with the man in question and are looking to start one with him. If this is a prospective love interest, then be sure first that you have the right chemistry and all going for you.

It is the right chemistry and attraction that will get you in the door. This is especially important at the start of a relationship. If he showed a little interest, let him be the one to ask you out on that date. Make yourself unavailable and a little scarce so that you intrigue him enough to seek you out.

Let him chase you. Let him text you first. This is because when he sees he has to work a little harder to win your affection he is intrigued by it. He sees it as a challenge and men love challenges. And the more he discovers, the more intrigued by you he gets. Make your first two dates more of a fun hangout rather than a serious all or nothing stakes date.

Have more fun with games and just anything else that would relax you both. Remember that he is probably very nervous on your first date check out this helpful article on 11 impressionable things to do on a first date with a girl. When you are a relaxed and fun sport to be with on a first and hopefully second date, you get him fascinated by you. He wants to spend more time with you after that date to learn more about you. Reveal enough about yourself on your first two dates, but not too much.

Give him just enough to keep him curious about who you are. Say enough to leave him guessing and coming back to know more about you. And the more he comes back, the more emotionally attached he gets. This is also part of being a little mysterious.

It will be hard to say no all the time to him because you have the hots for him. But always remember that it is for a good cause — to get him emotionally attached to you. When you are not always available to him on a whim, you also show him that you are a woman with a life of your own and who is doing something with herself and time. And that makes him all the more interested in you. As much as he wants to always talk about you, let the conversations always be a balanced one that equally talks about you and him.

In this way, you show him that you are also interested in who he is and knowing all you can about him. A man who sees that a woman is equally as interested in him always connects with her. He feels seen and heard, and that will always draw him in. When he sees that he has the opportunity to be your knight in shining armor, that will also draw him in. Men love women who are not just fun to be around but are also smart and savvy and versatile in the things they can do.

And why is that? Showing him you are swank, savvy, and smart tells him you will bring a different excitement to a relationship if he pursues one with you. If you have a savvy skill like speaking a second language, for example, you can show it off too.

You immediately connect with an awesome coach via text or over the phone in minutes. Bryan Zarpentine Bryan Zarpentine is a freelance writer and editor whose work can be seen in many forms throughout the Information Superhighway. By Kate Ferguson. By Amanda Chatel. By Averi Clements. By Lyndsie Robinson. By Amy Horton. By Sarah Burke. Search Search for:. What else do you feel?

I would encourage her to let out those emotions, to cry. So, that was a balance of me wanting to help support her and protecting myself but I was making it a priority to help her go through whatever she was going to go through. I was there for her, and she knew that the reason I was doing all of that was that I cared about her.

We have some powerful free resources to help you attract your man, get him to commit to a long-term loving relationship. You can get that by going to MYMQuiz. So, what do I mean by this? There may be other reasons why you would split up, maybe value differences and other things, but at least avoid basic arguments if you manage expectations properly.

He wants to help himself help the relationship by communicating that clearly to you. So, for example, when I was dating Antia, we were living in Waikiki where we met. So, I was helping manage her expectations that I was interested in her and in the relationship, but I had other things going on.

I was working.